Anonymous asked:
I've been sex repulsed most of the time since my rape last year, and I don't know how to talk about this with my boyfriend. I don't want to disappoint him and sometimes I have sex to satisfy him and avoid hurting his feelings. I feel responsible for his needs and like I owe him sex in our relationship. I don't know what to call the times when I've done this, since I haven't really spoken up about it, but I feel like he's ignored my body language, and one time I told him I didn't want (part 1)

selfcareafterrape:

(part 2) to have sex, and he kept pushing it, and I eventually broke down in tears. Would that qualify as attempted rape or is this an overreaction? Am I overcomplicating things and overreacting?

(part 3) I can’t tell how much of my feelings toward him/this are real and valid, and how much is me being triggered because of my past experiences, and feeling like he is the same as my rapist. (who raped me through coercion)

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Pushing someone to have sex with you, after they have said no, is coercion and it is rape. and it is not okay at all.

You don’t owe him sex. it doesn’t matter if you’re in a relationship, it doesn’t matter if he has blue balls, it doesn’t matter. You do not owe him sex. Ever. And if he’s making you feel that way? he’s a rapist. 

People who do not check in for consent, who do not make it a safe place for a no to be said, do not get to pull the ‘but if you really wanted it to stop’ card. They do not get to say ‘but they didn’t say no’ when they never asked and especially if they’ve disrespected no’s in the past.

It doesn’t sound like this relationship is safe for you. Not sexually and not emotionally.  

You deserve better. 

Take care of yourself, okay?

thetowndrugdealer:

Bae: let’s go lay outside together and watch the stars glimmer in the sky

Me: *points to glow in the dark stars on bedroom ceiling* nahh I’m good tho

(via greatwhiteprivilege)

marceddy:

when people are really rude and douchey and everyone still loves them

image

(Source: lampsarepeopletoo, via heavymuffintop)